It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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