Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
