Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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