Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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