There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
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