Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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