I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
did i just pee glitter
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