Where are you?
In a non slutty way
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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