never play flip cup with pint glasses
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Randomize