it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
