Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
