dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
