i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
