so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
