Barsexuality is the new black.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize