Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Randomize