She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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