he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I am mentally ready for anal.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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