Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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