Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
