Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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