ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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