Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
i dont even know how to be here
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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