bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize