I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
