I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize
