Im at strip club and am horny
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize