her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
