are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
