sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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