I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
