this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize