I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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