Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
