he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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