I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
i out mim tonsoeep
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