Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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