Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
