What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
