I wish my penis had an off switch
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Randomize
