I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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