how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize