just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
