maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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