When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
