atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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