Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Randomize
