Three words: puerto rican gang bang
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Randomize
