yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
