I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
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